


Superluv

by dreamyemptysouls



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Fluffy, Humanstuck, M/M, Non-Sgrub, Song Inspired
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-08-10
Updated: 2012-08-10
Packaged: 2017-11-11 20:41:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,032
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/482706
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dreamyemptysouls/pseuds/dreamyemptysouls
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Your name is Tavros Nitram and you've been in love for years. And for one reason or another, your love could never be returned.</p>
<p>The object of your affections is Gamzee Makara, and you've known each other practically since birth, living side by side, tiny house thriving in the shadow of a towering mansion. As kids, you'd swiftly climb the wall between you to walk alongside him in his garden, bask in the constant joy of his wonderfully cheerful demeanor, until his father showed up at one of the opulent windows, sending for the butler to scurry you out.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Superluv

**Author's Note:**

> For [Ari](http://princeaspartame.tumblr.com/), who requested GamTav inspired by [this song](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_NONLMR7dbM) (hence the title).
> 
> This turned out way bigger than I expected. Oops.

Your name is Tavros Nitram and you've been in love for years. And for one reason or another, your love could never be returned.

The object of your affections is Gamzee Makara, and you've known each other practically since birth, living side by side, tiny house thriving in the shadow of a towering mansion. As kids, you'd swiftly climb the wall between you to walk alongside him in his garden, bask in the constant joy of his wonderfully cheerful demeanor, until his father showed up at one of the opulent windows, sending for the butler to scurry you out.

Peasants like you had no place with one of the richest families in this society, he'd say. Keep away from my son, or I'll make your life a living hell.

You'd come back home bearing scratches on your knees and elbows from tripping, running away from the butler and his broom, and your dad, a tiny man with the sturdiness of a bull, would shake his head at you and, concerned, suggest that you'd finally give up on this, since all it did was hurt you.

But you'd refuse, because in the safety of your room, looking through the window at the neighboring house, you'd know how trapped he was in his laws and rules and expectations, and you knew how he deserved so much more. In these moments you felt like a coward, for you could give him all he wanted, the two could run away in a silly childish dream, and you could explore while he was happy

So you spent the rest of your childhood and your early teen years skipping past rules imposed by your parents, just so you could spend time with him, but - ashamed of yourself - never really be able to help him out. On particularly mischief-inviting nights, you'd hold his hand and scurry well beyond both your houses, and laying on the ground you'd try counting the stars. Or, sitting around a powerful lamp, its flame bright between you, you would have smuggled out a kit of face paint and smudged his face with bright whites and indigos. He would smile, genuine and crooked and quirky, and you were pretty sure in those moments he was happy.

Except this period of happiness was short lived, for his father, a tall, lean man, hair completely white despite not being nearly old enough for that, eventually found out about all these escapades, and his patience had reached its breaking point. After he caught the two of you lying on the grass on one unlucky night, Gamzee's face caked with paint, he had had enough.

He dragged the boy away from you, threatening you and your family in the process. All you did was stand there, too coward to act, to speak, to think. You watched the Makaras leave, paralyzed, staying behind, and that was the last time you saw your friend in years. When you returned home that night, safe and sound but broken in ways that weren't obvious to anyone but you, your father merely held you, and told you to go to sleep.

The years without him were lived with deep regret and self-hatred, for letting things pass without taking action was a horrible crime to you, and you felt like you failed him in every little promise you had made to him, and to yourself. Not seeing Gamzee again, even if he still lived right next to you, hung heavily in every action you took, but unfortunately it wasn't the only cause of misery throughout the years.

You had thought about barging into the Makara residence before, make a scene, demand that Gamzee received the freedom he deserved, but all of these became nothing but short-lived whims after the accident.

Stuff like that happens, you guess. Bad luck gets to every life and yours was no exception. In your case, extreme bad luck aligned to being in that very spot at the wrong time meant being hit by that car and lose use of your legs, but to be honest, it wasn't as if you were giving all that much use to them before. In the blur of your surgery, you saw many people come and go. You saw your worried Father, a bunch of your closest classmates, you saw your friend Vriska, holding your hand through the haziness and the pain.

A part of you had hoped he'd be there too, but no such luck. You stayed at the hospital for weeks, Vriska coming in occasionally, with homework and her usual quirky disposition, keeping you on your toes - so to speak. It was hard, to learn how to move in ways you had never expected to, relying on arms when legs faltered, on people's support when your strength diminished, and your constant forlorn mood did not help this one bit. Getting on your wheelchair for the first time marked the beginning of something you were sure not to like at all, but you resigned yourself to this fate anyway, gripping the armrests tightly, pursing your lips to a thin line.

One of the biggest changes regarding your disability was the need to change schools, which only complicated things further for your father - for this school was farther from your house - but made you feel freer from constant looks of pity, not to mention it was much better adapted to your wheelchair. Spending your studying days in this school meant you could no longer see Vriska every day, and you felt her absence dearly, as you felt yourself drawing comfort from the thought that she'd yell at whoever dared make fun of you or give you hell.

But being in this school also started something you had never dreamed of, not ever since that complete schism, years ago. This was the school Gamzee Makara attended.

You saw him again on your third day at school, and you barely recognized him. He had grown taller than you, way taller than when you struggled for support to attempt a semblance of standing. His hair had grown with him, reaching well below the base of his neck, and he kept it tied in a neat knot, even if the curls threatened to break loose at any given time. He was way thinner than what you remembered, and that was probably why you couldn’t recognize him at first.

But it was him, and wow, he had a beauty and charm to him you couldn't see before, that left you there motionless and staring at him for quite a while. There was something there somewhat dimming these pleasant features though, and you noticed in him the traces of sadness, breaking his smile, drooping his eyes, hunching his posture. Your own expression fell, and you wondered just how much changed in his life. An echo of old promises rang through you now, making you consider if all of this was an elaborate ruse to give you a second chance at succeeding at them.

This thought busied your mind for the next few days. Besides school and keeping a low profile and missing your old life, you now began looking forward to catching glimpses of him between classes, and the few answers you got from the random questions you asked, painted quite the grim picture of him to you.

You had no doubt his father was mostly to blame, enclosing Gamzee from the rest of the world in his claws, and the company the boy kept now reflected that most accurately. No matter how close you passed by him, hands tightly gripping the wheels of your chair, he wouldn't recognize you back, and he kept a blank expression while seemingly listening to the several arrogant-looking boys hovering around him.

From the few classmates that answered your questions about him, you found out that this blankness of expression was a constant in him now, and you found that - unfortunately - all too familiar. All of these news brought you great distress, and the part buried deep in you that kept screaming for action, for courage, for confidence, kept begging you to do something, anything, about this.

But what could you do, when he had forgotten you so simply, when you were bound to a chair, when you had failed him once?

You were already planning on doing nothing about it and merely going on with your life, but fortunately someone didn't let you sink so soon.

Vriska didn't come and visit that often now, after you moved to your new school, but sometimes she'd claim her life got too boring and only your dweeby shenanigans could fill that particular void in her. Your father would open the door for her and the two of you would hang out in your room, where she'd fill your ears with the latest gossip from your old school while the two of you indulged in pretty intense sessions of video games.

But today you were not without gossip yourself, and Vriska took quite a lot of interest in the news of Gamzee's return to your life.

"Well then. This is your chance, Toreadork," she simply stated, ramming your character out of the playing screen for the nth time. "The boy is back and you're right there - not to mention you have the perfect cover. What are you waiting for????????"

You sighed, proceeding to explain to her all the ways your life was rendered all the more complicated ever since your disability happened, but you were surprised when she, in true Vriska fashion, merely scoffed at you.

"So what? Can you not speak? Don't you have that little flame in your little heart of yours wanting to do something? Don't make excuses for yourself, Tavros. This is not beyond you, and I think I can actually help you on this one..."

You had always known Vriska had a flair for the dramatic, the show, the intricate webs of displays of amazingness. But you never thought this would get so far.

After she left your house without any further words on this matter, you kept pondering on what she had meant with her helping you. Would she go to his school and punch the assholes constantly harassing Gamzee for him? You had no doubt she would be able to, and with her luck, abscond the hell out of any consequences.

But the next day would show you just how wrong you were, and just how far the spider web stretched.

You vaguely remembered Kanaya from your old school, but apparently she and Vriska were good friends, and at least that explained why she was the one ringing on your bell now, striding inside with tons of different kinds of fabric and other sewing utensils in her arms. She was very pretty, Kanaya was, in a way that was neither obvious nor common, that made the viewer keep their eyes on her for a while before finding every little detail that made her look stunning, and you vaguely noticed that she was quite aware of this skill as your own eyes trailed over her.

Vriska followed close behind, saying Kanaya would be the one to help you. But how, you were about to find out.

This desperate situation called for desperate measures, both girls explained, and they would come up with just the thing to help you with this mess. You stared back at them, eyebrows raised in skepticism, but their motivation was unshaken, and this worried you slightly.

"We'll make you into a super-hero!"

Your reaction was obvious refusal, and you think you might have called the both of them insane for even considering such a thing, for thinking that was something three stupid kids (one of them in a wheelchair) could actually pull off. But they were having none of it, and they proceeded to explain all the ways this could go brilliantly.

"According to Vriska's intel, you are rather unpopular in your school, not to mention one of many disabled students, am I right?"

You nodded, eyebrows now knotted, wondering where this was going.

"This boy is also not aware of your presence in the school, meaning it would be rather easy to craft this potentially super hero character for you, as well as keep your 'secret identity' secret."

"Um, yeah I guess. But it still doesn’t quite tell me something: what do you want me to do, and how the hell am I supposed to do it like this," you ask, pointing to your legs.

You watched them exchange glances and sigh. "Toreasnore, you know we wouldn't ask violence from you, because let's admit it, you were pretty lame at that even before the accident. But we are asking you to be confrontational, to put yourself out there, and how loud your voice speaks has nothing to do with whether you can walk or not."

You have a hard time believing this, quite sure that if you even attempted something like this, you'd be mocked and teased for ages, but Kanaya approaches you slowly, hands on her hips and expression much determined.

"Listen, Tavros, we are not making you do anything you don't want, alright? I will carry on with designing this suit, because in all honesty, the idea is very much exciting. But you will decide what you want to do with it in the end."

You huff, and sigh and whimper, trying to find yet another reason to avoid this mess, but in the end, you do feel like Vriska was right about everything she said, and maybe it was time to stop making excuses for yourself.

Torso slumped as you sat, you cover your face with both hands and eventually give your words of approval.

They quickly get to work.

You are actually quite impressed with how fast Kanaya comes up with a design, even if she doesn't let anyone but Vriska peek and work with it. You watch them busy themselves while you do nothing but wait, or allow them to go through your wardrobe and underwear drawer, taking measurements for God knows what.

After a while it gets too boring to just watch and you entertain yourself as you would without them there, messing with your playing cards and your computer. Your curiosity takes the best of you sometimes, and you try and peek, but as always, they are being completely reclusive about this.

They're finally done with whatever they've been messing with by the end of the afternoon, and you almost go through a minor heart attack when you see the final result. Oh no. Oh hell no. They can't be serious about this.

Splayed on a chair before you is an outfit you are sure was only made to upset you. Sewn with baby blue fabric, the plain t-shirt is the only normal part of the garment, when compared to the ridiculous cape or the bottom clothing piece that can only be referred to as panties. What the heck were they even thinking??

"What. No! Uh, this is even worse than I expected! How am I supposed to look even a little bit threatening wearing that??"

But they seem to have predicted your reaction, for Vriska is wheeling you closer to the outfit, and the two of them are now walking out your bedroom door.

"Jeez, just try it out, dummy!" is the last thing she says before the two of them leave. "That was still part of our arrangement!"

You sigh, knowing there was no chance of changing their minds, and making sure they were well away from the door, you face the outfit with a scowl and begin the arduous task of dressing yourself.

Once you're done, your arms sore and face flushed with embarrassment, you finally allow them to come back in, and the exhilaration and pride in their faces confuse you greatly.

"Tavros," Kanaya begins, and her expression is of full seriousness as she walks to you. "You have no idea how wonderfully this piece fits you. Come see."

She walks to the tall mirror on the opposite wall and you wheel yourself to it, already cringing in anticipation. When you get there, the awfulness isn't as big as you were expecting, but you still look rather ridiculous. You are only slightly convinced of this whole scheme - and actually impressed with their work - when Kanaya asks you to wear the mask.

The baby blue ensemble, flashy and almost clownish, like something taken directly from a shitty comic book, seems to gain credibility with that last piece, and after all, maybe their idea isn't so bad. Maybe the best part is the fact that you can't recognize yourself like this.

"So?" they ask, and you feel that if you said no, you'd be denying them Christmas for three years in a row. And also, deep down in you, you are now kind of curious to see where this can go.

"Um," you start, poking at your face over the fabric of your mask. You venture a smile, which quite involuntarily ends up growing into a full grin. "You know what, it's okay. I mean... I can't promise this will work, or anything. But I will at least try."

And that was all they asked, after all.

Your next day of school promised to be wholly exciting, and the reason for the novelty of it laid stashed away in your backpack. Not even your favorite classes held much interest for you that day, and you both yearned and feared the moment you'd see Gamzee again.

When it happened, during the break before your last class, you still considered giving up, letting the chance pass and go back to your ordinary life, but a small part of you, the one that had been denied expression all these years and had now the opportunity to redeem itself (not to mention your promise to Vriska and Kanaya), didn't let you chicken out.

There were two guys harassing Gamzee this time. 

It's not like they were touching him or pestering into something he didn't want to, but they had him cornered against the school lockers, and every time he moved to leave, they followed him quickly, trapping him yet again. Even from this distance you could see the painful discomfort on Gamzee's expression, and yet his resignation to this fate, the two young men - shorter and weaker than him - yet holding so much power over his actions.

This disgusted you greatly, just like it did every time you had witnessed it, or heard it from someone else. But this time you could actually do something.

You quickly made your way to the restrooms, and were thankful for your experience in doing this, which allowed you to change clothes so quickly. Facing the mirror, you still felt a little toolish, inside that silly costume, but the mask was on and soon your confidence boosted. If you played this right, you could help him. You could finally be useful.

You moved back there, and found the scene completely unchanged. Nobody had noticed you yet, even in your attire, but then again you welcomed the element of surprise. There was something scary and intimidating about facing someone else's bullies, people who had never noticed you before and you had rather wished it stayed that way, and you think you would have felt the same if you still stood on your two legs.

But for him, you would do this. For your own sake, for promises made and honor to be held, you would do this.

"Is it so hard to see he wants you guys to leave him alone?" is all you say, and you don't stutter when you wear your mask. The guys are caught by surprise, immediately stopping in their tracks, turning to face you with shock first, and then laughter on their faces.

"And who the fuck are you trying to be, eh?" one of them laughs, and the two move to stand before you, allowing Gamzee to see you properly for the first time. You're both hoping and fearing he'll recognize you, but before you can worry too much about that, you have them two to deal with.

"I'm... I'm not trying to be anyone! But you've been pestering him for ages and it should be more than obvious by now that he's just not interested."

You could see the conflict inside them so very clearly, how they struggled with the insult to their authority you've dealt, and how they couldn't just hurt you, because your disability was very real and the consequences of harming you were just as real. You could see their struggle, and how timid and shrunken they suddenly became, and as you advanced, wheeling yourself so you were by Gamzee's side, you saw how uncomfortable they were, how quickly they stumbled to leave.

You felt your heart thundering inside your chest from the unspeakable thing you had just accomplished, and then Gamzee was finally looking at you with no shame, and maybe this would be the moment when your cover was blown. But the moment never came.

"Who are you?" he eventually asked, and there was clear expression on his face, on those eyes of a blue so dark that it bordered on violet. This was the first time since you found him again that you saw him show something, and to you that was a victory enough already.

But you shook your head and began moving away. It was way too early for you to tell him. "Just a friend. I'll be around!"

And the fact that he didn't even try to follow you was helpful, for it meant you had more than enough time to change back. Your last class was spent in an incredible sense of daze and amazement, and you thought this was what it meant, to be proud of yourself. When you got home and called Vriska, she yelled through your excited report, and encouraged you to keep going. You felt as if you'd never want to stop.

The next two weeks were an excellent follow up to this initial plan. Next time those bullies tried harassing him, they went to a different part of the school, quieter and distant, thinking you wouldn't follow, but you showed up yet again, and their frustration was visible.

Between themselves, the bullies started spreading news of this masked vigilante that seemed to protect only Gamzee, and you could see them in the corridors, staring carefully at every boy in a wheel chair - of which there were many - and you had to contain a sly smile whenever they passed by you and didn't recognize you.

They decided to change their tactics on their next few times, they decided to be more public about their overtures towards Gamzee, but that didn't scare you away. Friendless as you were, it was easy for you to detach yourself from the crowd and enter a random restroom, it was easy to slip back into the scene in your costume, and to their shock, you had the small crowd of stunned students on your side, even if there still were giggles of disbelief and mockery towards the silly ensemble. Now, it was not just you but all of the school body to scare them away, and like this, your plan couldn't have gone better.

Even when they tried cornering you, following you to the restroom where you changed, you were pleased to see you had your own allies, boys with the same physical structure as you who were also in a wheel chair, who made a row in front of the bullies and frustrated them to no end when they couldn't pick you from the crowd.

All in all, your project was a success. And your biggest success was the difference you saw in your attitude, and in his.

You'd catch him looking more alert and emotive, you even watched him interact with other people, who actually made him genuinely smile. And, whenever he'd pass by a boy in a wheel chair, you'd see how he studied him in hopes this was the person who had intervened, and then you had to contain your smile as well, even if you wished to go there and yell that it was you all along.

Some of your allies knew who you were already, and it was pleasant to be part of a small group, to belong to something this noble, to believe that you were actually capable of changing things.

Soon enough your antics were on everyone's lips, and though you had never found a name for yourself, the people seem to have done it for you, and the Blue Bandit sounded fitting enough. Not everyone at school liked what you did, especially the higher authorities, but since there hadn't been any violence and most of the people were taking so well to you, nobody really bothered anymore.

You would come home and find your dad smiling at your disposition, you would invite Vriska and Kanaya over, and they looked at you like proud parents. And the best part of it all was when they told you it was time to reveal yourself to Gamzee, you actually found it in your heart to agree with them.

The last encounter Gamzee had with the bullies was the following day. And they were all there, all of them, and you almost panicked, but went to change anyway, the crowd expecting you. But you saw, with pride, that once you got there, no longer Tavros Nitram but the Blue Bandit, Gamzee was handling himself very well on his own.

That was the first time you were able to see how strong he was, and it was just as you had pictured in your mind. You saw him get angry, take control of his own life, yell and swear and spit at the bullies to leave him alone, and that he was more than done with their horrible attitude. You were there, on the sidelines, and your heart was all aflutter when he noticed you and smiled, just before his motivation was recharged and he scared the bullies away for good.

The crowd broke in applause, and soon people came to break it down, but both you and Gamzee had had your moment of glory, and after everyone was ushered to their next class, there was only the two of you left on that corridor.

"Come with me," he requested after regaining his breath, and you followed him out, nodding, for you wouldn't trust your faltering voice with words right now. He led you to the tiny garden outside, beneath a tall tree whose leaves filtered the orange sunlight in countless pieces of green, and all of this was so cliché and ridiculous, but you wouldn't be anywhere else in the world right now.

He crouched before you, his tall, lean frame looking taller and leaner than ever - and you so small - but there was no hint of malice in him, just emotion and a palpable sense of longing in his eyes, and you were not afraid of anything in the world.

"Thanks for everything you did for me, bro," he almost murmured, coy and gentle, and curious all the same. "Do I get to know who you are now?"

Yes, of course you do, and you, Tavros, will pick the cheesiest way of doing that too. In a surge of bravery, you take his hands on yours and place them over the edge of your mask, and your grin is mischievous, wide, everlasting.

"Go on," you say.

And he complies.

Your mohawk is slightly mussed, your eyes are squinty from the slight change of light, but the recognition in his face is priceless, and you would have gone through that a thousand times just to see that reaction. You can see how his brain is whirring with questions right now, worried about your disability, wondering about your presence here, for how long he had been here, but it all dissolved into one single feeling, one single thought, and you squeaked as you felt him squeeze you against his skeleton, sincere, warm whispers of "I missed you... I missed you so much..." running through you as you embraced him too, spilling tears and happy noises into strong arms.

He pulls away first, catching the tears trailing from your eyes with long, bony fingers, and he's chuckling, holding onto your bare legs. "I... I had hoped it was you, Tavbro, but it felt so impossible. Thanks for proving me wrong."

"Sorry for taking so long to tell you, but.... I really wanted to do something more for you, and then my friends helped and this happened and..."

"It's okay. And you did help. I think this the best second chance we could have gotten. And... I promise they won't just pull us apart like they did last time. I have a thing or two to say to the old goat..."

And, after all, you ended up doing exactly what you wanted to, and more. So much more, because in a fit of bravery he is suddenly pressing his mouth to yours and you have to be dreaming, there is no way this is happening right now. Except it is and you anchor yourself to this splendid moment, winding your arms around him and kissing the breath off him. You'll have a lot to catch up with, a whole new battle to fight, but for now you feel like a true super hero, who has saved someone and been saved in return.

He nips at your lips as he pulls away, while you peck tenderly at his, and oh gosh how long you have waited for this to happened, for love to be shown and returned.

He leans his forehead against yours and laughs. "Your panties though. You are going to all up and explain those soon, aren't you?"

"Oh, shut up!" you laugh, pulling him close to yet another kiss. "Don't think I forgot about how you walked around in that super upsetting codpiece years ago! These are rad."

He fell onto you again and you relished on this, what a beautiful way to start a second chance.


End file.
